I’ve never known what to make of the dead week between Christmas and New Years. Part post-holiday blues. Where the red, white, green lights and inflatable Santas and songs that sound like childhood as they crackle over the radio change from glorious to grotesque. Where the turn of the calendar looms large in my mind. The future pulled entirely into the present.
Stunning, Tommy. I know for sure that over the course of this past year, your writing has grown more beautiful with every word. I also know that through our interactions and brief and as virtual as they may be that you do dance with the unknown, orbit gracefully, and trust in all that is difficult and pained. Happy new year, friend.
I'm raising a glass to the potholes and plot holes that you've so eloquently shared in the last year and those that are thankfully still to come. Because without them, what would we write about? I celebrate your inspired commitment to this work. Happy New Year.
Beautiful essay pal. Your writing continues to impress and inspire me, leaving an imprint on my brain with each word. Maybe you don’t need to look for anything, but need to just be. And to love the day to day experience of being.
~The next week, I met an older German man who was once a monk, meditating fourteen hours a day, sleeping three. He had a single tattoo: the Pali symbol for impermanence, sprawled in dark ink across his forearm. (naturally, I joked the tattoo was permanent, which he didn’t think was as amusing as I did).~
I can't remember the last time I actually took a full pause and LOL'ed. Probably says more about my sense of humor than anything, but worth a comment and more :)
I am left with a need to create and 'make an effort' after reading this. Have you considered a part time pursuit of life coach? I think you might be good at it. Also, laughed out loud at 'find a rock and push it up a hill'
"If it’s written in the stars or it’s me staring up and squinting my eyes, tracing my own constellations."
"But my endless and proper work is to dance with the unknown, orbit gently through the highs and lows, and always, always, trust in what is difficult. "
Humans are bad at predicting the future, especially bad at estimatibg risks, and they under estimating what will make them happy. People are more averse to the idea of loss than they are to entertaining gains. People are very poor decision-makers, in other words.
“I’m not sure if the childhood promise that “You can be anything you want,” is a blessing or a curse.” UGH so true, Tommy. The overwhelming amount of possibilities has only started to weigh on me since graduating. Going from a life that was always planned out for you and structured to a T, to one where you’re on your own to make all the decisions about your life and what to do with it is, sure very exciting, but so terrifying and anxiety inducing at the same time. You’re not alone in that, my friend.
Congratulations on all your accomplishments this year! I’m definitely glad you stuck to writing because reading your posts always puts a smile on my face. Thanks for being you!!
I read your essay and gasped many times over phrases and ideas that you crafted with such a deft hand. I am grateful for your writing, Tommy.
As for the unexpected, a paved, straight road that can be viewed in its entirety would be dull indeed. As much as I reeled from some of last year’s shocks and whirlwinds, I also appreciated the gifts that appeared without fanfare.
Happy new year, Tommy. It's been such a great year getting to know you and read your writing and chatting. Hoping for more creative collisions this year with you :)
If I were to wish you something that I would wish for my kids or myself, it's to NOT find what you’re looking for, Tommy. This might sound out of whack, but I think at the end of the day, it is the essence of life: looking for something. Getting close, but not quite there. And while at it, learning and growing and evolving and maturing emotionally. This is the magic of being a seeker. The moment you find that something, the magic ends. And you need something else to find, to keep at it, and let the magic continue. Life is an asymptote, you can get close to something but never really there. While this may sound frustrating, it is the beauty of being alive. I know it’s hard to grasp in your early twenties when you’d like to take over the world and find your true, stable self. But you’re a smart and sensitive human. Just my two cents.
Your writing is gorgeous, Tommy. And my God! You did all of that this year!! My essay this week (coming Tuesday) touches on my struggle with FOMO and I have to say that I may need to add a part on reading this and thinking, “I want to have done all those things” - not that I want to do them, but that I want to have done them 😂😂😂😅
It's been exciting to watch your writing evolve over this year. I was inspired by the depth/range of your last post. Your dedication and focus show (from Zoom meeting notes to annual reflections). It makes sense that you're feeling the taste gap; as you practice and hone your craft, you become more perceptive to the writing that speaks to you. I find that the more I write, the bigger and bigger the gap grows. It's kind of a funny paradox; as you improve in the eyes of others, it's hard to see it in yourself. But as long as you feel the slope (you've got the slope), you're in the right direction. Imagine your page metaphor but in years instead of days. Where will that slope take you in 10 years? I don't mean that in a goal-setting sense, but in the intuition in how you're ability to articulate and express will compound when you stick to something you love. Keep it up!
Stunning, Tommy. I know for sure that over the course of this past year, your writing has grown more beautiful with every word. I also know that through our interactions and brief and as virtual as they may be that you do dance with the unknown, orbit gracefully, and trust in all that is difficult and pained. Happy new year, friend.
Wishing you peace, love and contentment in the coming year, Tommy. Your writing is evolving beautifully. Super proud of you.
I'm raising a glass to the potholes and plot holes that you've so eloquently shared in the last year and those that are thankfully still to come. Because without them, what would we write about? I celebrate your inspired commitment to this work. Happy New Year.
Beautiful essay pal. Your writing continues to impress and inspire me, leaving an imprint on my brain with each word. Maybe you don’t need to look for anything, but need to just be. And to love the day to day experience of being.
~The next week, I met an older German man who was once a monk, meditating fourteen hours a day, sleeping three. He had a single tattoo: the Pali symbol for impermanence, sprawled in dark ink across his forearm. (naturally, I joked the tattoo was permanent, which he didn’t think was as amusing as I did).~
I can't remember the last time I actually took a full pause and LOL'ed. Probably says more about my sense of humor than anything, but worth a comment and more :)
I am left with a need to create and 'make an effort' after reading this. Have you considered a part time pursuit of life coach? I think you might be good at it. Also, laughed out loud at 'find a rock and push it up a hill'
"If it’s written in the stars or it’s me staring up and squinting my eyes, tracing my own constellations."
"But my endless and proper work is to dance with the unknown, orbit gently through the highs and lows, and always, always, trust in what is difficult. "
Beautifully said !Exclamation point.
Humans are bad at predicting the future, especially bad at estimatibg risks, and they under estimating what will make them happy. People are more averse to the idea of loss than they are to entertaining gains. People are very poor decision-makers, in other words.
the fact that this is written so genuinely only makes it funnier @tommy ...I'm now glad to have 'left' a corporate job
“I’m not sure if the childhood promise that “You can be anything you want,” is a blessing or a curse.” UGH so true, Tommy. The overwhelming amount of possibilities has only started to weigh on me since graduating. Going from a life that was always planned out for you and structured to a T, to one where you’re on your own to make all the decisions about your life and what to do with it is, sure very exciting, but so terrifying and anxiety inducing at the same time. You’re not alone in that, my friend.
Congratulations on all your accomplishments this year! I’m definitely glad you stuck to writing because reading your posts always puts a smile on my face. Thanks for being you!!
I read your essay and gasped many times over phrases and ideas that you crafted with such a deft hand. I am grateful for your writing, Tommy.
As for the unexpected, a paved, straight road that can be viewed in its entirety would be dull indeed. As much as I reeled from some of last year’s shocks and whirlwinds, I also appreciated the gifts that appeared without fanfare.
Happy 2024! May we ride the waves with glee.
Happy new year, Tommy. It's been such a great year getting to know you and read your writing and chatting. Hoping for more creative collisions this year with you :)
If I were to wish you something that I would wish for my kids or myself, it's to NOT find what you’re looking for, Tommy. This might sound out of whack, but I think at the end of the day, it is the essence of life: looking for something. Getting close, but not quite there. And while at it, learning and growing and evolving and maturing emotionally. This is the magic of being a seeker. The moment you find that something, the magic ends. And you need something else to find, to keep at it, and let the magic continue. Life is an asymptote, you can get close to something but never really there. While this may sound frustrating, it is the beauty of being alive. I know it’s hard to grasp in your early twenties when you’d like to take over the world and find your true, stable self. But you’re a smart and sensitive human. Just my two cents.
Be a seeker.
Happy New Year my friend.
Your writing is gorgeous, Tommy. And my God! You did all of that this year!! My essay this week (coming Tuesday) touches on my struggle with FOMO and I have to say that I may need to add a part on reading this and thinking, “I want to have done all those things” - not that I want to do them, but that I want to have done them 😂😂😂😅
It's been exciting to watch your writing evolve over this year. I was inspired by the depth/range of your last post. Your dedication and focus show (from Zoom meeting notes to annual reflections). It makes sense that you're feeling the taste gap; as you practice and hone your craft, you become more perceptive to the writing that speaks to you. I find that the more I write, the bigger and bigger the gap grows. It's kind of a funny paradox; as you improve in the eyes of others, it's hard to see it in yourself. But as long as you feel the slope (you've got the slope), you're in the right direction. Imagine your page metaphor but in years instead of days. Where will that slope take you in 10 years? I don't mean that in a goal-setting sense, but in the intuition in how you're ability to articulate and express will compound when you stick to something you love. Keep it up!
Reminds me a lot about some articles I read about our inability to predict what our future selves will do or want (and also how bad we are at actually analyzing how we’ve changed and how we might change). Wrote about them here: https://open.substack.com/pub/bessstillman/p/remembering-things-that-havent-happened?r=16l8ek&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
People are statistical prediction machines who aren’t very good at it when we turn the mechanics on ourselves.